"Sadness & Happiness"

If we want to avoid suffering and find true happiness we need to understand how the mind works.

1st we know - What is sadness?

Sadness is a feeling — it's one of the many normal human emotions, or moods, we all have. Sadness is the emotion people feel when they've lost something important, or when they have been disappointed about something, or when something sad has happened to them or to someone else. When they're lonely, people often feel sad.

When you're sad, the world may seem dark and unfriendly. You might feel like you have nothing to look forward to. The hurt deep inside may crush your usually good mood.

Sadness makes you feel like crying, and sometimes the tears are hard to stop. Crying often makes you feel better.

Sometimes when your mood is sad, you just feel like being alone for a little while. Or you might want someone to comfort you or just keep you company while you go through the sad feeling. Talking about what has made you sad usually helps the sad feeling melt away.

When sadness starts to go away, it can feel like a heavy blanket is being lifted from your shoulders.

Loss and Separation

This is the most common cause of sadness. It's a very sad thing to lose someone or something that you care about.

Changes

Changes that involve leaving something (or someone) behind, like moving to a new town or changing schools and leaving old friends can make you feel sad, too. Whenever some changes happened in our life we feel sad.

Disappointments

Disappointments like losing a game you hoped to win, getting a poor grade, or not being invited to a party can cause sadness. Sadness is a natural reaction to those things. How sad a person feels is usually related to how big or small the loss or disappointment is.

Relationships

Relationships bring happiness and fun much of the time. But tension or conflict in important relationships, or relationships that break up, can cause sadness, too. Many kids fight with family members, especially their parents, in the struggle to grow up and gain independence.

People often feel sad when all is not right between them and their loved ones, or when they get criticized or yelled at a lot. They fight about things like money, clothing, haircuts, school, and friends. In school, problems with teachers and grades may cause some sadness as well.

Sometimes with sadness, there are other feelings mixed in, too. When you're sad, you might also feel angry or guilty. You might feel like blaming others or blaming yourself.

So now we almost know all about sadness.

But we must learn how to fight with sadness and make our life happy.

So now we know about Happiness---

Unhappiness is something nurtured, you have learned it. Every credit goes to you for all your misery, but for happiness, you cannot have any credit. It is natural. You were born happy. You were happy in your mother’s womb….

Accept life as it is in its totality. You must look at the total: life and death together, love and hate together, happiness/unhappiness together, agony/ecstasy together. If you look at them together, then what is there to choose? If you see they are one, then from where can choice enter? If you see agony is nothing but ecstasy, ecstasy nothing but agony; if you can see happiness is nothing but unhappiness; love is nothing but hate, hate is nothing but love — then where to choose?

I know all these are not easy to understand so here are some tips to find happiness--

1. You choose.

How your view yourself and your world are conscious choices and habits. The lens you choose to view everything through determines how you will interpret what is happening. And from your interpretation you act. And all of this becomes your life.

You can choose to find happiness in small, everyday things. You can choose to interpret what happens in a positive way. Or in a negative way.

And your choices controls much of how much happiness your will find and create in your life.

2. Focus on the present, not yesterday or tomorrow.

When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.

You only have now. And now. And now. Yesterday is a memory and you cannot change it. Tomorrow is just a fantasy in your mind right now. So live more in the now, focus on the present moment and today. Think and worry less about yesterday and tomorrow. Otherwise you might miss a great deal of happiness that is available to you right now.

3. Don’t forget to be grateful.

One of the simplest and quickest ways to turn a negative and sour mood into a more positive one is to be grateful.

A few things you can feel gratitude for are for instance: The sunshine and the weather. Your roof. Your health. A good TV-show, a movie or a song.Your friends, family, co-workers and just about anyone walking down the street.

Just try if for a minute and see how it changes how you feel. And it’s a win/win solution. You feel great because you are grateful about your world and the people you are grateful for feel great too because they feel appreciated. So don´t forget about gratitude or you may forget about the happiness that is already in your life.

4. Help someone else find happiness.

"Happiness is like a kiss. You must share it to enjoy it."

When you make someone else happy – by, for example, helping them with something – you can sense, see, feel and hear it. And that happy feeling flows back to you. And then, if you’d like, you can boost you own ego by thinking something like: ”Wow, I really made him/her happy!”.

5. Get rid of a couple of your less valuable desires.

"That man is richest whose pleasures are cheapest."

If you want less instead of more, more, more then your desires are more likely to be fulfilled. And if you throw away a few of those desires that you may not really want or need that much anyway you’ll probably start to feel less stressed and worried. This is a calmer and better place to be to enjoy your day (tip #2) and to take the time discover the happiness that is already in your life (tip #3).

6. Do what you like to do.

"Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful."

Yes do what you really like to do. But mostly we always think that how can we do this? What other people think if we do this? And many more things... so now its a time to do what you like to do. If there is something which is not harmful for other and by doing this you really feel happy then don't think about other and just do it.

7. Or at least do something.

One of the best ways to not find happiness is just to hold yourself back and do nothing. Seldom show up. Paralyze yourself through over analysis. It’s not always easy to take action, it can be scary and hard and difficult. But if you don’t take action you’ll be missing out on a lot. Including many moments, people and experiences that can bring you a lot of happiness.

So now don't think to much and at least do something for you to make yourself happy:-)